I like it Justin
And for those of you wishing to live in Australia here are some thing you should know......
1 The bigger the hat, the smaller the farm.
2 The shorter the nickname, the more they like you.
3 Whether it's the opening of Parliament, or the launch of a new art gallery there is no Australian event
that cannot be improved by a sausage sizzle.
4 If the guy next to you is swearing like a wharfie he's probably a media billionaire. Or on the other
hand, he may be a wharfie.
5 There is no food that cannot be improved by the application of tomato sauce.
6 On the beach, all Australians hide their keys and wallets by placing them inside their sandshoes. No
thief has ever worked this out.
7 Industrial design knows of no article more useful than the plastic milk crate.
8 All our best heroes are losers. (Shane Warne might just be a case in point. Australian cricketer who
was in a fair amount of trouble texting women in Australia and England asking them for sex)
9 The alpha male in any group is he who takes the barbecue tongs from the hands of the host and
blithely begins turning the snags.
10 It's not summer until the steering wheel is too hot to hold.
11 A thong is not a piece of scanty swimwear, as in America, but a fine example of Australian footwear.
12 A group of sheilas wearing black rubber thongs may not be as exciting as you had hoped.
13 It is proper to refer to your best friend as "a total bastard". By contrast, your worst enemy is "a bit of
a bastard".
14 Historians believe the widespread use of the word "mate" can be traced to the harsh conditions on
the Australian frontier in the 1890s, and the development of a code of mutual aid, or mateship".
Alternatively, Australians may just be really hopeless with names.
15 The wise man chooses a partner who is attractive not only to himself, but to the mosquitoes.
16 If it can't be fixed with pantyhose and fencing wire, it's not worth fixing.
17 The most popular and widely praised family in any street is the one that has the swimming pool.
18 It's considered better to be down on your luck than up yourself.
19 The phrase "we've got a great lifestyle" means everyone in the family drinks too much.
20 If invited to a party, you should take cheap red wine and then spend all night drinking the host's
beer. (Don't worry, he'll have catered for it).
21 If there's any sort of free event or party within a hundred kilometres, you'd be a mug not to go.
22 The phrase "a simple picnic" is not known. You should take everything you own. If you don't need to
make three trips back to the car, you're not trying.
23 On picnics, the Esky is always too small, creating a food versus grog battle that can only ever be
solved by leaving the food behind.
24 If your nick name is 'Blue' - you have red hair.
aussie
Topic: Things you need to know if you want to live in TX (Read 2116 times)