Sue,
Seems like a long time since I've seen a post from you !
Here's the part numbers that you will need :
11111262141 4 each o-rings for the cylinder hold down studs.
11111337567 2 each o-rings for the cylinder base.
11121337818 4 each molded rubber seals for the pushrod tubes.
11121338716 2 each cylinder head gasket.
11121338426 2 each rocker arm cover gasket ( if needed ).
As far what to use for sealing, all of the rubber parts only require a light coat of oil or something similar to petroleum jelly, to ease the installation, especially the o-rings so they don't roll out of their groove and get cut or twisted.
The cylinder head gaskets , get a sealant especially made for cylinder heads, make sure you get the areas that the long cylinder studs go through, if you don't get it sealed properly, it will leak oil that goes to the rocker arm area.
The polished areas of the pushrods most likely were caused by the cylinder head gasket. It can move a little bit on installation, so most likely it wasn't centered . Next time you get back to the bike, insert a push rod and see if the polished area is about in line with the cylinder / cylinder head joint.
The riding season is winding down by you, and the best part of the riding season has just started here !
At 2 pm today, it's 91 F (33 C). morning low was 53 F. (12 C.), so we get some pretty wide temperature ranges this time of year .