A red O-ring is OK. When you see the white one it will be the same size.
Metal Shims (washer) goes in first. How many you need depends on the difference between the outer edge of the engine case and the outer edge of the canister. (Initially I measured this depth with a tire tread depth gage.) If the distance is too great, the oil goes around the edge of the o-ring (either red or white) and drops into the sump (without going through your engine). So effectively you have a "leak" you can't see. You need to read these articles and measure the distance between the canister and the outer edge, probably get rid of the paper rubber gasket on the case surface and use the appropriate number of metal shims between the oil filter canister and the large ($2000 dollar) o-ring. Remember shims first then the o-ring then the cover.
One good way to know you are doing right is to lose the paper gasket and just have the metal on metal of the outer cover. If you have got the right pressure on the o-ring, oil wont leak outside the filter cover on the outside of the bike.
Be careful not to over torque the three bolts that hold the filter cover to the case. Realy tight does nothing other that to strip the threads in the case.
Good luck.
BTW - mine 1980/03 R65 takes two shims and no paper gasket. Your results may vary.